Tuesday, March 31, 2009

I'm going to break character for a minute and tell you about the advertising. In an attempt to make as much as 0.0002 pennies a day, I am now selling ads through Project Wonderful. It's a great way to get yourself seen for a pretty small amount of money. Most of the ads on this site are free or in the 1-2 cent range, so if you want to get the word out to as many as 50 people a day, go to Project Wonderful and sign up.

Any questions or comments about the site should be directed at this post because I do not respond to everyday posts. This is to ensure that you get the purest experience possible. I do read the comments and they're funny as hell most of the time, so keep it up.
Marmaduke has, once again, put on his blackface. He's lucky there are no people that have any color in the area that he lives in.

Monday, March 30, 2009

Marmaduke is the reason that the economy collapsed. He knows damn well that he can't afford to buy that $500,000 house, but he just has to keep up with that Boxer across the street.

Saturday, March 28, 2009

Marmaduke is a racist because he doesn't want his old chair to end up with the Non-colored people.

Friday, March 27, 2009

Marmaduke has become a drug dog. A drug trafficking dog, that is.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Marmaduke is a giving lover. This causes problems when he perceives someone to be his lover and they do not.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Honestly, the Anderson's aren't even trying to disguise the relationship between Marmaduke and his Owner-Lady anymore.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Marmaduke's Owner-Lady tried to live life in the slow lane, but Marmaduke is a go-go type of dog and wants her to get back into the fast lane.

Monday, March 23, 2009

Marmaduke is trying to lay low at his Owner-Family's house. The police are on to him though and have surrounded the building disguised as Animal Control.

Also, Marmaduke's Owner-Lady is reading STUFF for some reason. I always thought that was a magazine for men. Once again, the Anderson's fail to remain relevant

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Marmaduke is trapped in his dog-house. This makes no sense because: a) Marmaduke is a dog and thus has the capability to dig, b) Marmaduke is usually represented as being at least 3 feet tall, which is much higher than the snow on the ground, and could just walk out of his dog-house. The dog-house also brings certain questions to mind such as: how does such a giant dog fit into such a small house?

Friday, March 20, 2009

Marmaduke has stolen his Owner-Man's credit card number and used it to download accordion music from iTunes.

It perplexes me that a dog has the ability to steal credit card information.

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Small children are shooting pucks at Marmaduke. Clearly they do not realize the danger of pissing off a gigantic dog that has no qualms about eating small children.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

The creators of Marmaduke do not understand how microwave popcorn works.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Marmaduke's Owner-Lady is upset because Marmaduke didn't let her finish last night.

Monday, March 16, 2009

Marmaduke's chair has committed suicide.

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Marmaduke is a dirty, dirty boy. Marmaduke's Owner-Lady knows this very well.

Friday, March 13, 2009

Marmaduke has traveled to a land where there is no color and for some reason is being penalized for it.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Marmaduke has a tooth-ache from the 18th century.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Marmaduke moved all his money out of the stock market before it collapsed. Marmaduke's Owner-Man was not as shrewd with his money.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

For the first time in his life, Marmaduke wants to reciprocate.

Monday, March 9, 2009

Marmaduke has empathy towards other living things, as long as they aren't human.

Saturday, March 7, 2009

Marmaduke is cold-blooded. This explains his enormous size and his thirst for human blood.

Friday, March 6, 2009

Holy shitballs Batman! Joe Mathlete has a new Marmaduke explained! With any luck he'll give us all what we want and keep doing it this time.

In the meantime, I will continue to do my crappy blog, but you really should check out Joe Mathlete Explains Today's Marmaduke while it's new.
Marmaduke is attempting to rape his Owner-Family's car. To be fair, it was acting very seductive, driving around without a hood, almost like it wanted it.

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Marmaduke has returned from a bukkake party.

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Marmaduke's Owner-Family only has enough money to order food for Marmaduke. Marmaduke's Owner-Man is tiring of this arrangement, but is unable to get a raise due to his poor job performance which, in turn, is due to his lack of nutrition.

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Marmaduke's Owner-Lady is trying to explain to Marmaduke why they can't have an afternoon liaison.

Monday, March 2, 2009

Marmaduke is in blackface.